I have a fiancée I love dearly and who treats me well, and a beautiful son who turns l 1 years old in the next few days.

A successful supportive family. I work a great job and get paid well, and I finish my biomed major within the next year.

I am a horrible alcoholic though and my parents and gf dislike that a lot about me and I understand.

I just can not stop. Tonight I talked my fiancée into letting me but 2 fifths of vodka tonight. It's almost 2 am and I am still drinking and I know I disappointed her.


I don't know what to do. I feel like my drinking is the only bad thing I have about myself, but this shit is a very bad vice for me to have.

I'm not a bad drunk as I am a functioning alcoholic, but my family and my woman worry about me so much.

I am just so frightened of the things that are happening or could happen due to my drinking.

I've been drinking for the last 4 or 5ish years. I started in the military but never got to stop.

I only drank to quell sadness and anger back then and now I do it to regulate my emotions.

What should I do?

I've puked blood last year but stop drinking as a result. My throat and my liver are not as bad as they were last year but I feel like it's getting back to that point.

I feel like a shitty son, a shitty boyfriend, and a shitty father even though I don't get arrested and act like a dick.

Please help me.