>>7012209I'm
>>7012168At my absolute worst period I was drink a 750ml of vodka every single day. Was at that level for about 5-6 months and had been steadily building up to that for quite some time. I would wake up in the morning and almost immediately have to have a drink just to be able to function enough to get in the shower and get ready for work.
I know the feeling about being in relatively good health despite consumption levels that should never be reached, because it basically gives you an excuse to continue drinking.
But trust me, the problems develop very slowly. For me, I started noticing differences in my digestion, then next thing you know I'm having horrible indigestion and forced myself ot throw up it was so bad. That's the first time my vomit had blood in it.
Progressed to me getting so sick I wasn't able to actually eat food anymore; almost all my calories were coming from vodka and whatever mixer I was using. Sometimes that mixer would be some zero calorie fake sugar drink because I was gaining weight from the massive amounts of shitty booze I was drinking. Anyway, this culminated in me not being able to go to work for several days one week because I just had zero energy. My body was only processing alcohol and had no other nutrients. Try having to somehow force yourself to get out of bed just to go to the liquor store so you can survive, and BARELY being able to make it there and back without feeling like you're going to pass out.
I started throwing up this nasty black bile. There was nothing in my stomach besides booze and it was going to kill me, so one day I decided I could no longer live like that because if I kept trying to, I wouldn't even be alive anymore anyway.
My life had gotten to a point where it was impossible to operate without alcohol in my system. I could no longer sustain that lifestyle. It was all but impossible. I told my best friend everything. I had kept it hidden so well for so long, he was shocked.
