>>23842251It's been a year and I still get choked up thinking about this video. I'm just a tech, I can't handle the shit my patients are unloading on me.
I recently had a guy who was a lot of fun, but I could see profound sadness in his eyes. He was fucked up, extremly fucked up, but he sang, entertained, great guy to be with. Then for some reason he opens up to me about how he started having drug problems, his family went to al-anon and made addicts out to be horrible people and now his whole family thinks he is just like the addict archetype they make out to be some kind of ultimate bogeyman.
They threw him out even after he put his siblings through college, did all kinds of shit for his family, and they throw him out on the street and are so afraid of enabling someone desperately trying ot get better they can't even spare a fucking couch for a month as repayment for a college education. He told me his gf called him in the middle fo fucking some other guy, put sugar in his car's gas tank, and burned his clothes.
I don't know if I'm more angry or sad, judging by my quivering lips I"m guessing sad. I"m still gettin gused to emotions even though I unlocked them over a year ago. How can you do that to someone though? I want to save everyone but it's not my place. I go out of my way to ensure they get social services and numbers to shelters, but it's not enough. I suggested he take his family to an open AA meeting so they see addiction is a very dynamic problem and al anon is fucking bullshit for frustrated venting families dealing with addicts in denial, but I still can't stop thinking of him and it's been weeks.
Or even my patients from months ago, or even from my first day when I held down a guy for a shot who was threatening to kill me and talking about iraq shit and then coming up to me in tears an hour later apologizing for his behavior. This job is tearing me apart and even two bottles of bourbon a week is barely getting me by.
